Relationships

Good to know

Posted in Relationships on March 9th, 2010 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment
2648708476_2eacda3f2c
  • Before you buy, look carefully at the perks and problems that are associated with each breed. Talk to vets and to other dog owners, and read-up. Information on most breeds is also available online. Your dog will be your companion for many years – so make an informed choice. Don’t just take home the first cute puppy that you see.
  • Think about diet… and costs. Food consumption is substantially less with the smaller breeds – so you can afford to feed them the best quality imported food without breaking the bank.
  • Smaller and toy breeds will also find life on a marble floor easier than the larger breeds, who are more prone to leg deformities as a result of sliding around too much.
  • Think about employing a dog walker to ensure that your dog gets sufficient exercise. Don’t just take him out on a leash, though – ideally you should give him at least 10 minutes a day off the leash: playing or chasing a ball, for instance.
  • Groom your dog every day to prevent unsightly dog hair shedings on your clothes and furnishings. It will also make him fel more loved. And a dog that feels loved is always a better dog to live with.
  • It is critical that your dog receives a balance of regimented training and playful exercise.
  • Always remember that a dog is an intellegent and sensitive being, and ought to be treated with respect and with love. Never underestimate him. If you follow this rule, you will always have a happy home life – however small your flat may be.

When to change your doc

Posted in Health, Relationships on February 26th, 2010 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

Most of us know enough about doctors to know that “beside manners” is generally limited to fictional doctor-nurse romances. That is why, perhaps, we usually tend to get so intimidated by these men of science. So much so, often we don’t question them or their judgement at all! But the next time you visit your doctor, here’s what you need to ask yourself:

Does he listen to you and respond to your queries, or does he make you feel like you have no right to know what’s happening in your body or your child’s?

Is the prescription he has written for you legible?

Is he willing to discuss the medicines and dosage with you – without making you feel you ought to know it all?

Does he list alternative lines of treatment, or tell you there are none and get irritated that you asked?

Is he willing to take an emergency call from you?

At the end of his checklist, if you are still comfortable, he is the doctor for you. Otherwise, simple go to the next best.

For your child and you

Posted in Relationships on February 12th, 2010 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

US experts advise you to multiply your child’s grade by 10 – that’s the number of minutes he should spend on daily homework. In the Indian context, experts feel this may be somewhat unrealistic, but it is still a benchmark of sorts if you add time to prepare and wind up, except during tests.

1. Get him to do simple stress-busting exercises. Deep breathing is great – make him sit down and take slow, deep breats for a few minutes every day.
2. If he’s older, allow more free time or breathers in between study slots.
3. If you are shouting at him too often, it’s time to let go, Take a break!
4. Boost his self-esteem through praise and encouragement.
5. Try story telling if he’s young. It helps create a parent-child bond and also serves to comfort the stressed child.
6. If he’s in middle school, you can already assess his potential (in terms of intelligence and aptitude) fairly well – so don’t push him to achieve the impossible. It should also be possible for both of you to arrive at mutually acceptable levels of work and goals. Try it – your child may surprise you. Pleasantly.
7. Take care of yourself. Children are extremely sensitive to the feelings of an adult and reflect patterns of stress behaviour seen in adults.
8. Finally, remember he too is an individual. It is not fair to impose your ambitions on him. Instead, enjoy him the way he is. And watch the stress ebb away.

Understand Autism

Posted in Relationships on February 6th, 2010 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

aut
It affects the way the brain processes information, preventing individuals from properly understanding what they see, hear and otherwise sense. People with autism have to learn normal patterns of communication and ways to relate to people – unlike the rest of us, who develop this skill naturally as part of our normal developmental process.

Symptoms range from mild learning and social impairment. It may occur alone or accompany problems such as mental retardation, cerebral palsy or seizures, which characterise it as a ’spectrum’ disorder.

A complex, lifelong developmental disability, autism typically menifests itself during the first three years of life. A number of autistic children never develop speech; while others do, but rarely use it to communicate.

ASD (autistic spectrum disorders) has no single, specific cause, though current research links it to biological or neurological differences in the brain, and not poor parenting, family income, lifestyle or educational level.

An autistic child looks ‘normal’, but has unusual behaviour and speech patterns:

  • repeats, confuses ‘you’ and ‘i’, and expresses needs rather than emotions
  • enjoys rocking, spinning or flapping hands
  • repeats the same activity for long stretches of time
  • appears to be hyperactive
  • prefers routine, dislikes change
  • gets upset for no apparent reason
  • appears indifferent to pain, heat, cold or danger
  • avoids eye contact
  • doesn’t mix with others.

Irresistibly Attractive

Posted in Relationships on January 29th, 2010 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

Being irresistibly attractive is about energy. It is your energy, and the energy of the people with whom you relate. Energy is invisible, real and very powerful. Your energy extends out around you and bumps up against the person next to you. The person’s energy next to you bumps up against you and your energy.

We put energy out into the world, and we attract it back to us. Have you heard the expression, ‘like attracts like?” If it is true that “like attracts like,” would not you agree that you want to be putting good things out there so you attract good things back?

Notice the kind of energy you are putting out into your world. Is it positive or negative? Remember that “like attracts like.” If you are not happy with what is coming back to you, then take a look at the kind of energy you are putting out there to begin with in the form of your thoughts, words, attitudes, and actions. Ask yourself this, “what can i think, say or do differently the next time so i can attract back to me what i really want?” And then do it. Start practicing being irresistibly attractive today.

The Power of Words

Posted in Relationships on January 27th, 2010 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

The words you choose in communicating with others make a big difference in how well you connect with the people in your life. Just a few words can either build bridges or build walls. Bridges keep the communication flowing easily and harmoniously. Walls create distance and cause disharmony. Which do you want to build? If you want to live success, make sure you are building bridges.

Remember, a sure fire way to quickly improve your all round communication is to immediately eliminate “should” and “have to” from your language. Become aware of when you use these words with yourself and others. Notice the reactions to them. Be aware of people using these words with you and how you react to them.

To create harmonious communication, make sure the words you choose build bridges rather than build walls. Stop using such demanding words on yourself and others. Begin building bridges today, and hit delete on “should” and “have to!”

Reading and Infants

Posted in Relationships on January 13th, 2010 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

Babies are born learners. Studies show reading to infants boosts languages and speech skills as well as overall intelligence. Babies learn by imitation, so every time your read to them, you reinforce basic concepts like turning a page and following text from left to right. The sound of your voice and warmth of your body help a baby to think of reading as pleasurable.

A checklist of resolutions

Posted in Relationships on January 12th, 2010 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

happy_new_year

  • I will let things be: Home and office work lists should be made up of absolute essentials for the day (only do-able portions of work you need to complete in the long term get included). Learn to delegate.
  • I will plan holidays: Take into account office and school breaks, destinations, bookings, money… Stick to your plan.
  • I will organize health checks: Do it for all the family and for yourself – you are not the most unimportant person in your family!
  • I will work at a better diet: But remember, there is such a thing as ‘taste’ so don’t get obsessive about your healthy eating either.
  • I will cut down on drinking (and smoking): Plan on weekend drinking within limits; then take the abstinence period up by a few days. Stagger cigarettes in a practical manner to start off.
  • I will not nag my partner: Get a life! Most women end up expecting their partners to be a mental twin – cultivate forgotten hobbies.
  • I will be more patient with my children: Set aside days when you vow not to shout at them no matter what (unless absolutely necessary).
  • I will plan my day: Do it the night before. Plan your children’s days if possible, but remember to reward them if they stick to it.
  • I will pay more attention to my parents and my in-laws: Remember they brought you up – or him, in the latter case.
  • I will not be bothered by gossip: Avoid bad-mouthing others. Learn to brush it aside if you hear something negative about yourself.
  • I will reward myself: Go easy on yourself. Set periodic, do-able targets and reward yourself suitably thorugh the year when you fulfil your resolution fro the time frame – even if that be a fairly short one.

Get a reluctant child reading

Posted in Relationships on December 2nd, 2009 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

42-17371503

  • Take a cue from your child’s interests: buy books accordingly.
  • Play board games. They usually involve written instructions.
  • Have family sessions where everyone takes a turn to read.
  • Cook together and get your child to read you the recipe.
  • Leave notes for him to read. Anything from ‘I love you’ to ‘How about a pizza dinner tonight?’
  • Buy age-appropriate books.
  • Read aloud interesting bits from a storybook to grab her attention.

Revisited

Posted in Relationships on November 19th, 2009 by mon60006 – Be the first to comment

Sometimes it’s not just the grandchildren your parents want to connect with – they may like some time with you too! Yes, they know you are there for them in a crisis; but once in a while, it’s good to just have a chat, pass the time of day, do something together…

  • Make it a point to call them up at least once a week, and don’t be in a hurry to rush through to the end of the conversation.
  • Send a thoughtful gift every once in a while – even if there’s no occasion or festival.
  • Take time to visit in person. If your parents live far away, try and organize at least an annual visit during a special festival.
  • When you do visit, make it a point to do things with your parents, rather than staying out all day with friends: It could be just spending time in the garden admiring your mother’s plants over tea; or it could be listening to old records with your father.
  • Where, when and how depend on your specific situation, but it’s a good idea to arrange surprise holidays for your parents. Take care to choose a place they would enjoy – your idea (or your children’s) of a perfect vacation may be their idea of mayhem!
  • Don’t forget their special days – such as birthdays and marriage anniversaries – now that you have a family of your own to tend. At least cal, even if you can’t be there in person or forget to send them a gift or a card.