For your child and you
US experts advise you to multiply your child’s grade by 10 – that’s the number of minutes he should spend on daily homework. In the Indian context, experts feel this may be somewhat unrealistic, but it is still a benchmark of sorts if you add time to prepare and wind up, except during tests.
1. Get him to do simple stress-busting exercises. Deep breathing is great – make him sit down and take slow, deep breats for a few minutes every day.
2. If he’s older, allow more free time or breathers in between study slots.
3. If you are shouting at him too often, it’s time to let go, Take a break!
4. Boost his self-esteem through praise and encouragement.
5. Try story telling if he’s young. It helps create a parent-child bond and also serves to comfort the stressed child.
6. If he’s in middle school, you can already assess his potential (in terms of intelligence and aptitude) fairly well – so don’t push him to achieve the impossible. It should also be possible for both of you to arrive at mutually acceptable levels of work and goals. Try it – your child may surprise you. Pleasantly.
7. Take care of yourself. Children are extremely sensitive to the feelings of an adult and reflect patterns of stress behaviour seen in adults.
8. Finally, remember he too is an individual. It is not fair to impose your ambitions on him. Instead, enjoy him the way he is. And watch the stress ebb away.